Seem's body perfection finally meets cubism. Picasso approves!
A good woman is always by your side during the bad times to remind you that none of this would've happened if you had just listened to her in the first place.
Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens.
They're calling it the Apollo G.
A friend once told me, “You can’t go around saving everyone. They have to learn to save themselves.”
Great friend. Terrible lifeguard.
My landlord says he needs to come talk to me about how high my heating bill is.
I told him: "My door is always open."
I started reading a horror story in braille.
Something bad is about to happen - can feel it.
The word queue is ironic.
It's just a 'q' with a bunch of silent letters waiting in a line.
The last thing my grandfather said before he died was "It's worth it to spend money on good speakers."
That was some sound advice.
Golf is so boring that the goal is to play as little as possible
Achtung: #sonnenbrillen schaden der Gesundheit! 🤣🤣🤣 Sonnenbrillen-Mafia!!! #newsonleo #jokesonleo
